Category: Adventures

To wear underwear, or not to wear underwear? That is the question.

To wear underwear, or not to wear underwear? That is the question.

Boys, what do you mean, you don’t have on underwear?

boys' underwear

What is it with men and boys not wearing underwear? I truly don’t understand it. Maybe, because I’m a girl? There have been a number of instances that have convinced me to give up the fight. Forget the underwear, focus on showering, teeth-brushing, and deodorant wearing. 

No Underwear – at the Doctor’s office

The first time I was made aware of my oldest son not wearing underwear, was by our pediatrician. Harley knew he would need a vaccination at his 11 year check up. I knew he would freak out, and have an all out fit about going. So, I did what any good mother would do. I tricked him.

Me: Harley, go take a shower. I have to run some errands, and you need to go with me.

He whined and fussed a bit about the shower, but 20 minutes later, we were out the door.

Half way through the drive, his brow furrowed.

Harley: We are going to the doctor, aren’t we.

Me: Yes. We are.

Harley: I don’t want to go. I’ll have to get a shot, and I HATE shots.

Me: Yes, I know you HATE shots, but they keep you healthy and safe. So…you are going. And, besides, the doctor just likes to make sure you are growing and everything is the way it should be.

He wasn’t happy. We waited a bit before being called back. The nurse came in and took all the vitals; asked if we had any concerns or questions. When she was done, she assured us the doctor would be in shortly. Then, we waited a bit more for the doctor to come in. She listened to his breathing, his heart, checked his reflexes, listened to his stomach. She turned to me and said, “Mom, I need to check his boy parts to make sure everything is developing and growing as it should be.” She looked at Harley and said, “I am going to look at your boy parts, okay?”

He blushed a bit, but agreed. She lifted the waistband of his shorts, looked in, and looked at me. She asked, “Mom, are you aware he isn’t wearing underwear?” I could feel my face begin to turn red and my eyes widen. I saw Harley turning red and a sheepish grin spread over his face. I didn’t know what to say. No, I wasn’t aware. He took a shower. He was clean. No underwear? Who does that!?! 

The doctor laughed. She said not to worry as it apparently is more common than most moms would like to admit. Once she was done, she told Harley he was growing as he should be. His height and weight were good for his age. The nurse came in, gave him his shot with minor commotion and panic involved.

We wrapped up the well doctor visit and went ice cream. Ice cream fixes almost everything from the pinch of a shot to the shock of finding out your son isn’t wearing underwear. 

No Underwear – Pants shopping

Flash forward a couple of months, and we have our first cold front in Texas. This means we need new pants. It’s warm enough most of the year to wear shorts. The first cold snap is when you realize how much your children have grown. So, off to Target we go. Hubby needed new pants for work. Both boys needed new jeans for school, as it was too cold for shorts. Everyone gets the size they think they need, and we head to the dressing rooms. The boys go in one. My husband stands there.

“Aren’t you going to try those on? They might be too short, or too tight depending on how they are made.”

The hubby replied, “No, they’ll be okay.”

Me: Really, I’m not returning them for you. Go try them on.

Hubby: I can’t.

Me: Why not?

Hubby: I’m not wearing underwear.

Me: Deep sigh, shaking of head.

So, I go to the dressing room door where the wild boys were sent with their respective new pants.

I ask, “How’s it going? Do they fit? Do you need a different size?”

Harley comes out.

Me: Did they fit?

Harley: Ummmm, I’m not sure.

Me:  What do you mean? It’s not hard. You put them on. Either they fit, or they don’t.

Harley: I can’t put them on.

Me: Why not? Help me understand. I don’t want to have to bring things back. It’s a pain to return things. Please go try them on. 

Harley: I’m not wearing underwear.

My last words for the shopping trip: Go stand with your father.

No underwear: What changed?

Eventually boys will start wearing underwear. What changes? Age and. . . .having to dress out for Junior High PE. The change is short lived. Once they are comfortable and on their own – they stop wearing underwear again. They think no one will know. Boys! What was I thinking!?!

Junior High! Here we come. . .

Junior High! Here we come. . .

Junior High- a whole new world

are entrepreneurs born or made

So, we went to Harley’s 6th grade parent orientation. The counselor spoke about changing hormones, growth and development. . . basically what we were headed for with our son this year. The assistant principal spoke about what we could do to help our children make a smooth transition. This included things like, practicing using his combination lock, helping him organize his backpack and binder, and changing clothes quickly.

This last bit caught my attention.

Getting my son dressed in the morning can take numerous reminders to get the socks….now the shoes…tie them….brush the teeth….don’t forget deodorant. Where are the glasses?  Each reminder requires a return to the bathroom, or bedroom. This is life with ADHD. 

Now, he’s going to have to get dressed quickly at school!?! By himself? In just minutes?

Well, apparently students have between 3 and 5 minutes to change for PE and make it into the gym for warm ups. If they are focused, and doing what they should be, this shouldn’t be an issue. And, after PE, they have about the same amount of time, maybe a minute or two longer, to shower, if they want, and change back into school clothes for class.

When my husband and I arrived home, I told Harley he needed to practice changing clothes quickly.

Harley: “Why? I’m not getting undressed at school.”

Me: “Yes, you will because you have to dress out for PE,” I explained.

Harley: He got a slightly panicked, puzzled look on his face and asked, ” You mean people will see me get undressed? But, that means I have to wear underwear.” (He hates to wear underwear, and has been known to go commando on more than one occasion.)

Me: “Yes, you will need to wear underwear, but no worries. Everyone else will be changing too. Everyone will be nervous and worried, just like you. It will be like your brother in the locker room at hockey practice.”

Harley: “Oh.” I could tell he still wasn’t on board with the idea.

Me: I explained at the end of PE he would be able to take a shower, and get dressed for class.

Harley: “NO WAY! I am not getting naked at school.”

Me: I went on to explain, he could keep baby wipes (“Mom, I’m not a baby.”) and deodorant in his locker for after class.

Harley: “Mom, can’t I just spray myself with Febreeze? It smells nice and fresh. Then I wouldn’t need baby wipes, or deodorant, or to be naked at school.”

That’s my boy.

Junior High – An Entrepreneur is Born

We are three weeks into the school year, and getting dressed out for PE is no big deal now.

Because I refused to allow my son to spray himself with Febreeze after PE (#meanmom) and insisted on sending baby wipes and deodorant for his gym locker, he has become quite the entrepreneur.

At dinner this evening, he shared the fact that he’s chosen for football because he’s good at snapping the ball.

And, his friends owe him money.

Me: What? Friends owe you money?

He went on to share that everyone asks for his baby wipes because no one wants to take a shower, yet they don’t want to be stinky. He said he was selling them for $1.00 a wipe.  I’m proud that he’s smart, and aware of the whole supply and demand thing. I just hope he’s joking because he would most likely get in trouble for selling baby wipes.

He then said he’d like to take extra water bottles with him to school. He thinks he can get $5.00 a bottle.

My hubby asked, “Don’t you think people would use the water fountain for free?”

He replied, “No, Dad. The water is warm. The line is slow, and they make you go fast, so you are still really thirsty.”

Smart boy…. my son, the entrepreneur.

gym lockers

What are your kids up to at school? What do I have to look forward to next?

 

Mom adventure- Please don’t put popcorn in your ear.

Mom adventure- Please don’t put popcorn in your ear.

Mom adventure

We all have our stories to tell, and battle scars to show. Do you have a story that involves an ER visit?

boy activities mom adventures with boys

Mom Adventure – Morgan is the boss.

When Harrison was four the mom adventure involved popcorn and ears.

After I got home from work, Harrison and I went to get the mail.  Our mailbox was at the end of the street. As we walked down the sidewalk, this was our conversation:

Me: So, how was your day?

Harrison: Bad.

Me: Why, what happened?

Harrison: I put popcorn in my ear.

Me: Why?

Harrison: Morgan told me to.

Me: Morgan is not the boss of you. You need to be the boss of yourself.

Harrison: Morgan is the boss. He said so.

Me: Did you tell Ms. B., your teacher?

Harrison: No, she would be mad.

Me: Did you tell Daddy?

Harrison: No, he would be mad.

Me: Is it still there? Does it hurt?

Harrison: It hurts if you touch it.

little boy with paint on his face
What do you mean I wasn’t supposed to paint my face?

Mom Adventure – Don’t panic. I’ve got this! Really, I’ve got this…..right?

My mom brain is trying not to panic with thoughts like:

I’m sure we can get the popcorn out. At least it wasn’t a pea, or bean, because those swell and get stuck! We can be thankful for the little things, right?

Thank goodness he told me. What if he didn’t tell anyone. How long would it have been in there? I’ve heard some horror stories that involve stench when something has been in there way, way too long!

After we made it back to the house, I got a flashlight. Yep. There was a popcorn kernel in his ear. You could see it, but not get to it. I was secretly hoping….I don’t know what but hoping there wasn’t a popcorn kernel in there!

little boy with candy in his nose
Look what I can fit in my nose!

Mom Adventure – Google How to Get Popcorn out of a Ear

Then the thoughts turned to: What could I use to get it out that wouldn’t push it farther in?

He tried standing on one leg and hopping up and down. You know, like when you are trying to get water out of your ears after swimming. No, it didn’t work.

We needed something with suction. The shop vac! I put the shop vac to my ear. It was suctiony, but it didn’t hurt. So I tried that. No luck.

The only thing left to do was call the doctor.

We ended up at the after hours clinic where our favorite pediatrician washed it out with a super size syringe of water.

Who would have thought a giant syringe of water would shoot the kernel right out of his ear? Clearly not me, or we’d have tried that at home before calling the doctor for FREE!

We can only hope he will not put anything else in his ears!

What has YOUR kiddo put in their ear?

You have come to the right spot to tell your mom adventure stories and enjoy ours. Let’s laugh together and share the magic of motherhood!

boy laughing

Mom Adventure – Did I hear that correctly?

Ears aren’t the only small space where you’ll find popcorn kernels and the like. When my daughter was three she was playing with Barbie in the living room. I was enjoying a very rare moment along in the nearby study emailing a friend when I heard them chatting away. How sweet, I thought, until I heard these words, “Daddy, I put a bone in my nose.”

My heart stopped.

My husband didn’t blink and I heard the conversation continue as I flew into the room. Dad didn’t know that the Barbie doll had a dog…and that dog had an itty bitty bone. I really suspected that itty bitty bone was now inside our daughter’s nose!

Mom Adventure – Yes, I heard that correctly.

Of course it was late evening. Of course it was the weekend. AND after taking a peek into cutie’s nose with a flashlight….of course that itty bitty bone was inside her nose.

Great. Now what?

Mom Adventure – Google and a call to the Dr.

Ok, I warn you now. Do NOT google ‘something stuck in the nose’ unless you have a REALLY strong stomach. I nearly threw up after doing that myself. GROSS! You think your kid stuck something weird in their nose. OH, you just have no idea what all google has photographs of.

Since googling ‘Help! My kids stuck something in their nose.” didn’t give me anything but a nauseous stomach. I called the pediatrician. Of course it was after hours ($$) but crazy they were open for some unknown reason and we raced to see them.

Mom Adventure – The Professional’s Opinion

So, after rushing to the pediatrician’s office, all the way there, thinking how lucky we are the office is still open we arrived. We laid out the preschooler on the table and started peering in her nose. I was so relived to get this professional opinion….drumroll, please.

“She has a toy bone stuck in her nose.”

Um, ya’ think? And….there wasn’t anything the pediatrician could do. Next stop – the ER.

Mom Adventure – The 2nd Professional’s Opinion

So now we are at the ER and it is getting late. It must have been a full moon, too, because even though it was an ER in the suburbs on Denver, there were some really….interesting…..things going on in the ER. Ew.

Once we were back in a room to see the dr where my daughter happily eats the popsicle they gave her and watches the Disney channel on the TV, I get the 2nd professional’s opinion,

“There is a toy bone stuck in her nose.”

OMG – ya’ think? And….nothing to be done here. Next stop = pediatric ENT.

boy wearing silly glasses
Who is that mystery boy?

Mom Adventure – The 3rd Professional’s Opinion

So now it is Monday morning and we are in the ENT’s office. The whole crew is with us – Dad and baby brother.

We get back in to the room to see the ENT and anxiously await the dr. The dr arrives, peers into the 3 year old’s nose, with a VERY long hose with a light on the end, and that is just as much fun for all as it sounds, and we get the 3rd professional’s opinion,

“There isn’t a toy bone stuck in her nose.”

What? Did you say...isn’t?? Yes…the bone is now gone.

Before we could breathe a sigh of relief we are told this might not be good news. What happened to that bone? If it came out the nose that would be good but if it got sucked back into the lungs that would be bad.

So…off for x-rays we went.

Mom Adventure – The 4th Professional’s Opinion

At this point, the little toy boy that belonged to Barbie’s dog is now costing an absolute fortune! To think of the trouble I went to keeping Barbie’s toys away from the baby when in the end it was the 3 yr old who stuck on in her nose! Who knew?

Oh, the joys of an x-ray for a 3 year old who does not like to be still and stuck on a cold table where mom can not go. We quietly and, as patiently as possible, waited for the 4 professional’s opinion,

“No bone in there.”

Ok, so now we breath a sigh of relieve. What happened to the bone is still a mystery. Thankfully, this is my ONLY story of something that got stuck in the kiddo!

What has your kid done? We’d love to hear all about it. Drop your story in the comments.

Funny words of wisdom, you know you're a mom when

Being a mom is a fabulous adventure! Who knew!?!

Being a mom is a fabulous adventure! Who knew!?!

We all have Adventures as a Mom.

Being a mom is hard, right? Well, in case you are wondering if what you are going through is within a range of normal. . . From pregnancy, in all of its stages and glory to childbirth, from newborns to high school graduations there are so many things nobody tells you about. You  may research and ask a million questions, but until you are in the thick of it, there are things you didn’t know  you even needed to ask about. Being a mom IS hard, but it’s also the most rewarding, fun, tiresome, and never-ending job you will have. It’s a privilege some women work hard, and endure so much to have. No matter where you are as a mom, we are here with you.

Moms of all ages and stages are invited to join us as we share our insights, advice, and wisdom about all things mom related. We all need a little support, encouragement, and advice from time to time. And we all need to remember to laugh and enjoy the small moments. So, grab a beverage of your choice and join us. Three moms, with different parenting styles and backgrounds,  have joined forces to share their mom wisdom.  From how to keep your family from starving, decorating your home for any occasion, making sure your child has a great education, relaxing and enjoying some down time, to staying sane while keeping it real – You are never alone in your adventures of being a mom.

Adventures by Mom
Who is that mystery boy?